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The fact is that the majority of our thoughts and actions are on autopilot. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing either. Our habits, routines, impulses, and reactions carry us through our lives so we don’t have to stop and think about it every time we wipe our ass or start a car.
The problem is when we’re on autopilot for so long that we forget we’re on autopilot. Because when we’re not even aware of our own habits, routines, impulses, and reactions, then we no longer control them they control us.
The problem is when we become aware of the actions we take and the habits we get ourselves into. This is one of the reasons the internet can be such a pain. People tend to use it as a tool to get together and chat with friends and get away from their own issues, and then forget that those friends may not be interested in their issues, or may be in a different topic entirely.
That’s why it’s important to take care of your own needs. It can be easy to forget to do so, and it’s also easy to fall into a pattern where you don’t have time to do so. We’re not blaming the internet for this. It’s not the fault of the internet either. It just happens.
There are two ways to fix this – either you learn to pay attention to your own needs, or you learn to ignore the needs of the people you are around to try to please.
This can be a hard thing to do. We have a tendency to focus on what other people want. We talk about our goals and our ambitions.
People don’t think of themselves as self-interested. They don’t think of themselves as competitive. They think of themselves as being kind of nice. They think of themselves as being considerate. They think of themselves as caring. They think of themselves as good at something.
We are all self-interested. We are all competitive. We are all considerate. We are all caring. We all do. We all do this, and we do that. But, to the extent that we do, we should look at it as an opportunity. It’s an opportunity to say, “I care. I care about this, I care about that… I need this, I need that.
There are many ways we can be self-interested. We can be self-regarding. We can be self-entitled. We can be self-enabling. We can be self-deprecating. I think that each of us has to come to the realization that we are all selfish, self-interested, self-regarding, self-entitled, self-enabling and self-deprecating. Self-interest and self-regard are like a spectrum.
This is the idea behind the concept of the “spectrum of self-interest.” This is basically the idea that people are more self-regarding and less self-enabling and less self-deprecating than they are self-loving and self-regarding.
